Haynes has struggled with anxiety all his life. In January 2016, after years of public speculation concerning his "secret gay past", an off-the-cuff response he made on Tumblr regarding a comment on photos that appeared in gay lifestyle magazine XY a decade before was taken by many media outlets as confirmation of his coming out. Not yet ready to speak openly about his sexual orientation, the renewed attention led Haynes to seek treatment for his anxiety for the next three months. He later publicly came out as gay in an interview in Entertainment Weekly in May 2016. Haynes revealed that he had concealed his sexuality based on advice from entertainment industry insiders who told him that being open about the topic would hinder his career.
Haynes and celebrity florist Jeff Leatham became engaged on March 11, 2017. They were married on October 27, 2017. In May 2018, Haynes filed for divorce from Leatham, but the pair reconciled before their first wedding anniversary.[41] However, in August 2019, they reached a divorce settlement.
In November 2017, Haynes was nominated to Out magazine's "OUT100" for 2017 in recognition of his coming out, his "self-actualization" and his professional work.
Haynes' mother, Dana, died as a result of cirrhosis in March 2018.His sister died in April 2020 after a long battle against cancer.
In March 2019, Haynes spoke publicly about his experience with alcohol and drug addiction, stating, "In 10 years, there were maybe 25 days I didn't drink. I remember when I started, it was a couple glasses of wine, and it regressed into really dark times." He recounted going through a treatment program that lasted four months to address the substance use.
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